Be Kind to Others, and Make Yourself Happy — Kon-kimo Enters Its 20th Year

This blog, Konna Kimochi de Iraretara — loosely, “If Only I Could Keep Feeling This Way,” or simply Kon-kimo — began on September 9, 2007. Today, it enters its twentieth year.

Over the years, writing here has become almost as natural to me as breathing. Yet there were times when I could barely write at all, and times when I simply did not want to. Longtime readers may remember those periods. Somehow, with encouragement from many people, I kept going.

So what have I really been writing about all these years? And what has this blog given me — or perhaps taken away from me?

Looking back, I find myself returning to one simple idea that has been part of this blog from the beginning: be kind to others, and make yourself happy. Nearly twenty years later, it still sounds simple. And it is still remarkably difficult.

This blog is called Konna Kimochi de Iraretara, which I shorten to Kon-kimo.

I started it on September 9, 2007, and today it finally enters its twentieth year.

These days I write every day almost as naturally as I breathe, so I no longer feel that it is particularly difficult. But longtime readers may remember that there were periods when I could hardly write at all, and others when I simply did not feel like writing.

Each time, many people encouraged me, and thanks to them I was able to keep putting down whatever happened to be on my mind.

So what is it that I have consistently written about through this blog?

What have I gained from it? And what, if anything, have I lost?

My daughter, who was one of the reasons I began this blog in the first place, is now a fully grown adult, working hard on the other side of the world.

As you might expect of a father and daughter, she has a slightly cynical streak that resembles mine. Fortunately, she has also inherited just the right amount of my wife’s kindness. She has friends she can trust, and from where I stand, that gives me some peace of mind.

Still, I sometimes wonder what possessed me to say to my elementary-school-aged daughter,

“You’re not very good at washing dishes, so you don’t have to do it.”

What kind of father says something like that?

I am fairly certain that this is one of the things I ought to apologize for before I die. I suppose my long-running apologies to my daughter are still not over.

That episode appeared in the very first post I wrote on this blog, on September 9, 2007.

Looking back at it now, I was a little surprised to find that the idea behind this blog was already there from the beginning. I wrote that if I could be kinder to other people, I might be happier myself — and that I wanted to try to treat not only my family, but even strangers I passed on the street, with kindness.

In other words, “Be kind to others, and make yourself happy” was not something I came up with years later. It was there on the very first day.

Perhaps that is exactly why the words “Be kind to others, and make yourself happy” have become a lifelong theme for me.

But it is not nearly as easy as it sounds.

I am still too hard on other people, and I often end up turning that harshness back on myself.

I do believe that making yourself happy can also help make other people happy. But the very meaning of happiness seems to be changing in today’s world, and it is no longer something that can be neatly summed up in a single phrase.

And yet, after keeping this blog going for all these years, I find myself thinking that Konna Kimochi de Iraretara really was a good title.

It suits a place where I can simply write down what I think and feel from day to day.

I am glad that today, of all days, I was able to realize that once again.

If I keep writing as I have until now, by the time another twenty years have passed, I will probably be nearing the end of my life.

Even so, I hope I will still be thinking about one thing after another each day — and writing some of it down.

What have I lost?

Nothing comes to mind, really, except the enormous amount of time I have spent writing.

But it was time I needed.

Twenty years of writing may have taken a great deal of time, but perhaps that time was never truly lost.

 

・・・

My First Blog Post — September 9, 2007 

The brief cool spell after the typhoon was over almost immediately, and the heat returned.

Or rather, I suppose it was the humidity.

I had been fairly busy with a couple of small academic meetings over the previous two days.

Today, I had planned to spend the whole day with my daughter. But when she offered to help with the dishes, I said, “You don’t have to help,” because I thought she was not very good at washing them.

I ended up discouraging her just when she was trying to be helpful.

My wife prompted me to go back, so we washed the dishes together and I apologized.

Still, I know I hurt her.

Something similar happened at yesterday’s meeting, too. Lately, I seem to have been treating people more coldly than I should.

Something to reflect on.

If I could simply be kinder to other people, I think I would be happier myself.

And yet I keep forgetting that.

So today, I am going to try to be kind — to my family, and even to the strangers I pass on the street.

September 9, 2007

・・・

Vocabulary for Learners

longtime reader
Someone who has been reading a writer, blog, or publication for many years.
長年の読者、古くからの読者

cynical streak
A tendency to doubt people’s motives or to see things in a somewhat skeptical way.
少し皮肉っぽいところ、物事を冷めた目で見る傾向

penance
Something done to express regret for a past mistake or wrongdoing. Here it is used somewhat humorously.
償い、懺悔。ここでは少しユーモラスな意味合い

backlash
A negative reaction or consequence that comes back after something you have done.
反動、しっぺ返し

nearing the end of one’s life
Approaching the final stage of life. A softer expression than saying “close to death.”
人生の終わりに近づく、死期が近づく

#DailyBlog #LifeReflections #JapaneseLife #WritingLife #Kindness #Kamakura #JapanesePathologist

Young People, Aim for the Blue Sky

After days of gray skies, a glimpse of blue appeared between the clouds this morning. It reminded me of something else I hope young people in Japan will continue to seek: the wider world beyond the familiar horizon.

For days, I had been longing to see a blue sky, and finally, this morning, I caught a glimpse of one between the clouds.

Even a brief patch of blue can brighten my mood.

The heat also seems to be making a comeback after a while, but apparently it will not last very long. On that point, I suppose I will simply have to accept it.

There is something I must do first when I arrive at the hospital today.

I need to help a clinician who is preparing to study abroad.

There are some documents that I have to write, and the deadline is rapidly approaching.

The paperwork itself is rather tedious. But more than that, when I think that I can be directly involved in the future of a younger colleague in this way, I feel both the weight of the responsibility and, at the same time, a certain happiness.

In recent years, we often hear that fewer young Japanese people are going abroad.

Even if only for a short period, I hope they will go out into the world and broaden their horizons.

In my own case, I spent only three months abroad. During the weekdays, I was practically confined to the laboratory, working hard with my eyes fixed on a microscope. Yet that experience continues to influence me even today.

It was not simply a matter of learning technical skills.

I want young people to encounter many kinds of “difference,” including differences in lifestyle, and to experience diversity firsthand.

Otherwise, Japan risks drifting back toward a modern version of sakoku, the isolationist policy of the past.

Of course, this would be very different from the sakoku of an age when there were no modern means of communication.

Precisely because we now live in an age when information from anywhere in the world can be obtained instantly, there is still great value in actually going abroad, seeing things with one’s own eyes, and experiencing differences for oneself.

Fortunately, Japanese researchers and professionals who go abroad are generally expected to return to Japan eventually. That should make host institutions relatively comfortable about accepting them.

Young applicants should make the most of that advantage.

And those who return will undoubtedly contribute to the advancement of science and culture in Japan.

But then comes the difficult question: who pays for studying abroad?

The other day, at a university, I saw a poster outside a medical department advertising a grant to support overseas study. The amount of support was stated in Japanese yen.

Apparently, the grant has existed for many years, but at today’s exchange rates, the amount would hardly be sufficient.

I think such support should instead be calculated on the basis of U.S. dollars or euros.

Of course, individuals themselves must make an effort to finance their time abroad. But we should not leave the burden entirely to them.

Government and the private sector should work together to create a system that makes it easier to send young people out into the world.

I hope as many young people as possible will aim for the blue sky they can see beyond the clouds.

And yet, human connections are strange things.

Only a few years ago, this person and I did not even know each other’s faces.

Now, before I knew it, I find myself deeply involved in an important turning point in that person’s life.

That is exactly why I want to give my full support.

Beyond the clouds, there is always a wider sky—and I hope our young people will have the chance to reach for it.

・・・

Vocabulary for Learners

broaden one’s horizons
To gain new knowledge, experiences, and ways of thinking by encountering unfamiliar people, places, or ideas.
視野を広げる。新しい経験や考え方に触れて、自分の世界を広げること。

be confined to
To have to stay within a limited place or situation. Here, “confined to the laboratory” means spending almost all one’s time working in the lab.
〜に閉じこもる、〜に缶詰になる。

firsthand
Directly through one’s own experience rather than through someone else’s description.
直接、自分自身の経験を通して。

drift back toward
To gradually move or return toward a previous condition, often without deliberately intending to do so.
徐々に以前の状態へ戻っていく、逆戻りしていく。

host institution
An organization, university, hospital, or research center that receives and supports a visiting student or researcher.
留学生・研究者を受け入れる大学、病院、研究機関などの受入先。

make the most of
To use an opportunity or advantage as effectively as possible.
〜を最大限に活用する。

exchange rate
The value of one country’s currency compared with another country’s currency.
為替レート、通貨の交換比率。

turning point
An important moment when a situation, career, or life begins to change significantly.
転機、人生や状況が大きく変わる節目。

#StudyAbroad #YoungResearchers #GlobalExperience #MedicalEducation #SupportTheNextGeneration #Kamakura #JapanesePathologist

When I Realize How Foolish I Can Be

A report about soaring protein prices in the United States made me think about weight loss, metabolism, and the strange ways we humans often work against our own intentions.

Protein supplements are reportedly becoming much more expensive in the United States.

One reason, apparently, is that more people are taking protein to compensate for the loss of muscle mass that can accompany weight loss from obesity medications. It is one of those strange chains of cause and effect in which one thing leads unexpectedly to another.

A very human story, somehow.

Ideally, of course, we would simply live in a way that keeps us from becoming obese in the first place. But that is easier said than done. We gain weight, take medication to lose it, and then start drinking protein shakes so that we do not lose too much muscle along the way.

I myself have recently watched my weight begin climbing again, and I had started thinking that perhaps I wanted one of those weight-loss drugs. But if losing weight also means losing muscle, then I have to think twice.

Muscle mass is going to decline with age anyway. Surely deliberately accelerating that process would not be a good idea.

The foolish part of being human is that we often fail to notice how absurd some of our own thinking can be.

I have certainly had my share of foolish ideas.

For a long time, for example, I did not really understand why eating fatty foods made me gain weight.

Somewhere in the back of my mind, I seem to have thought that even if I absorbed a few grams of sugar or fat, I could simply excrete the same amount later.

The whole concept of metabolism was missing from that picture.

I somehow forgot that excess energy is stored in the body as fat. Meanwhile, I continued eating as I pleased and was not exercising enough either.

Only recently, after realizing that my weight does not come down easily no matter how much I try to improve my diet, did something embarrassingly obvious finally occur to me.

The problem of “IN and OUT” is not really about the physical weight of what goes into and comes out of the body.

It is about energy.

I regret having thought about it so superficially, although by now I sometimes feel that I realized it rather late.

Still, better late than never.

Just when I had decided to become more active and take Anne for longer walks, I injured my ankle.

Then came a medical conference, where I spent almost the entire day sitting, followed by dinner gatherings in the evening.

Bad luck, perhaps.

Or perhaps the world simply has a remarkable talent for discouraging us whenever we finally decide to do something sensible.

But maybe this is what human beings are like most of the time.

Foolish, perhaps. Ridiculous, perhaps.

We ourselves are completely serious about what we are doing, while somehow continuing to do things that work against what we actually want.

We take ourselves seriously, even while behaving in ways that make us look wonderfully, hopelessly human.

・・・

Vocabulary for Learners

compensate for
To make up for something that has been lost or reduced.
「補う」「埋め合わせる」

cause and effect
The relationship in which one event produces another event.
「因果関係」

easier said than done
Something that sounds simple but is actually difficult to do.
「言うは易く行うは難し」

think twice
To reconsider something carefully before doing it.
「よく考え直す」

accelerate
To make something happen faster.
「加速させる」

metabolism
The chemical processes in the body that use and store energy.
「代謝」

excess energy
Energy taken into the body beyond what it immediately needs.
「余剰エネルギー」

better late than never
It is better to do something late than not to do it at all.
「遅くても、しないよりはまし」

work against
To act in a way that makes a goal harder to achieve.
「〜に逆らって働く」「〜の妨げになる」

hopelessly human
A slightly humorous expression meaning imperfect in a very recognizably human way.
「どうしようもなく人間らしい」

 

#WeightLoss #Protein #Metabolism #HealthyAging #MuscleMass #Obesity #JapanesePathologist #HumanNature #Kamakura

 

Cassette Tapes on Our Wedding Anniversary

A rainy weekend kept us at home, and an old audio system unexpectedly brought back a sound we had not heard in decades. On our 35th wedding anniversary, a cassette tape from the days before we were married opened the door to a flood of memories.

Rain from early morning.

They say that by tomorrow, a linear rainband may finally develop over southern Kanto, including Kanagawa Prefecture.

Up until now, whenever I heard about heavy rain in Kyushu, Hokuriku, or Tohoku, it somehow felt like something happening somewhere else. But this time, it may be where I live that gets hit.

I have work tomorrow, so naturally my first thought is, this could be a problem.

Then again, perhaps this is exactly the sort of situation where assuming, “I’ll probably be fine even if I push things a little,” is not such a good idea.

In any case, what really matters is whether the Yokosuka Line will be running tomorrow. I’ll think about it when the time comes.

 So, once again this weekend, the rain left me stuck at home wondering what to do. I decided to start by connecting the speakers to that audio system I wrote about before.

I still haven’t bought a stylus for the record player, but since I had nothing else to do, I thought I might at least get the speakers hooked up.

Then I went online to look for a stylus and discovered that they are actually rather expensive.

That made me stop and think. Before spending that much, I figured I should first make sure the system could produce any sound at all.

Fortunately, there is also a cassette deck, so I thought I would start with that. My wife, who has always been good at keeping things, dug out one of those upbeat cassette tapes we used to play on our drives when we were dating nearly forty years ago.

Naturally, I rewound it all the way to the beginning.

The way the rewind slows down gently near the end reminded me that this had once been considered a high-end cassette deck.

Then I pressed the PLAY button, and there it was again—the same slightly muffled sound we had listened to all those years ago.

“Ah, analog sound!”

My wife and I were both struck by the nostalgia.

And by the sound coming out of the speakers as well.

To a serious audiophile, this may sound utterly ridiculous, but it had been a very long time since I had heard music this loud coming from something other than a television—from a machine built for the sole purpose of producing sound.

Ever since the Walkman appeared, most of my listening has been through headphones or earphones.

And how many years has it been since cassette players disappeared from car stereos?

So perhaps it really has been that long.

Listening to it again reminded me how good analog sound can be.

Today is our 35th wedding anniversary.

Quite unexpectedly, we found ourselves remembering all sorts of things from before we were married.

And so, with a clear conscience, I decided it was time to buy that record-player stylus and clicked “Buy.”

An old cassette tape brought back not only an old sound, but also the days before we became husband and wife.

・・・ 

Vocabulary 

Linear rainband
A narrow, elongated zone of repeatedly developing rain clouds that can bring extremely heavy rainfall to the same area for several hours. The term is commonly used in Japanese weather reporting.

Yokosuka Line
A major JR commuter railway line running through Tokyo and Kanagawa, including Yokohama and Kamakura.

Stylus
The small needle that traces the grooves of a vinyl record and converts the vibrations into sound.

Cassette deck
A home audio component designed specifically for recording and playing cassette tapes.

Upbeat
Lively, energetic, and cheerful. Here, it is used to convey the sense of the Japanese expression “ノリノリ.”

With a clear conscience
Used here somewhat humorously for “心置きなく”—meaning that after confirming the system still worked, there was no longer any reason to hesitate about buying the stylus.

#weddinganniversary #cassettetape #analog #cassettedeck #vinyl #nostalgia #music #Walkman #Japan #dailyessay #memories

Being Asked to Do Things — and the Smell of HORAI

I spent the past two days at a conference in Osaka. The presentation went well, but just when I thought I could quietly coast toward retirement, another job was handed to me. Then came the familiar smell of Osaka’s famous pork buns on the Shinkansen home.

Yesterday and today, I was in Osaka for a conference.

To get to the venue, I had to walk through the underground passages of Umeda, one of Osaka’s busiest downtown districts, so I used my cane just to be safe.

In both Tokyo and Osaka, people seemed equally considerate toward someone walking with a cane, and I was able to get around fairly smoothly.

Still, Osaka was incredibly crowded.

Looking at all those people, it is hard to believe that Japan is heading into population decline. But of course, this is Tokyo and Osaka. The crowds in Japan’s two great metropolitan areas are hardly representative of the country as a whole.

It was only a small academic meeting, but I had prepared seriously and managed to give my presentation without trouble.

I finished almost exactly on time, although the discussion became rather lively afterward. Whether that was a good thing or a bad thing, I am not entirely sure.

At a small specialist meeting, most of the audience already knows the subject fairly well.

Even so, I try to make my presentations educational enough for younger colleagues while leaving some room for experienced specialists to join the discussion.

So when one of the senior people asks a question that is slightly off the mark, I cannot help feeling a little disappointed.

At my age, giving a presentation is increasingly like looking back over what I have learned through the years.

That was more or less how I approached this one, so I was fairly relaxed about it.

For an old pathologist nearing retirement, I thought that should be enough.

I had already served as the society’s executive secretary, and I had been hoping to keep a low profile from here on and somehow coast quietly to the finish line.

Then someone told me I should chair the meeting once again.

I declined as gently as I could.

Nevertheless, I somehow ended up being assigned to host the conference the year after next.

If someone senior tells you to do something, there is only so much you can do about it.

But being told to do it by people younger than you feels rather different.

I am not quite sure how to describe the feeling.

So, feeling slightly depressed about my newly assigned responsibility, I once again found myself in the crowded basement food halls of Hankyu Department Store in Umeda, buying souvenirs.

HORAI shop 

An Osaka colleague had warned me:

“Be careful if you buy HORAI pork buns. They smell.”

HORAI is a famous Osaka chain best known for its butaman—large, steamed buns filled with seasoned pork.

I had been warned.

And yet, once again, I bought some.

Now, on the Shinkansen back home, the smell is drifting down from the luggage rack above my head.

Fortunately, so far, nobody seems to mind.

At least this is one thing I may still manage to get away with.

I failed to escape the next conference assignment, but I may yet escape responsibility for the smell of HORAI.

・・・

Vocabulary for Learners

coast to the finish line
To continue with as little extra effort or trouble as possible until something ends.
できるだけ余計な苦労をせずに最後まで乗り切ること。

keep a low profile
To avoid attracting attention or taking on a prominent role.
目立たず控えめにしていること。

off the mark
Not quite correct or relevant.
的外れな、少しずれている。

chair a meeting
To be responsible for organizing or leading a meeting or conference.
会議や学会を主催・運営する。

food hall
A department-store area where many kinds of prepared foods and specialties are sold.
デパートなどの食品売り場、デパ地下。

pork bun
A steamed bun filled with seasoned pork. In Osaka, these are often called butaman.
豚肉の餡を入れた蒸しパン。大阪では「豚まん」と呼ばれることが多い。

get away with something
To do something questionable or troublesome without suffering any consequences.
問題になりそうなことを、咎められずに切り抜ける。

What I Learned from Walking with a Cane

Using a cane for the first time since my student days made me realize how differently the world appears when one small, inconvenient object becomes necessary. It also made me think about disability, visibility, and the limits of my own empathy.

Walking with a cane for the first time since my student days made me realize something.

The world looks completely different depending on whether or not you are carrying one extra, troublesome, yet very useful stick.

It is not easy to say simply what is good and what is bad.

But in any case, a cane is basically nothing but a nuisance.

And yet, although it is a nuisance, I need it.

I find myself unsure how to describe such a thing.

When I thanked my mother on LINE for the cane, she replied:

“Take care of yourself. Your father will protect you.”

When she put it that way, I felt I could not treat the cane merely as an inconvenience. So I have been using it carefully.

Yesterday was my first day walking with a cane.

It helped that many people immediately recognized that I was using one.

I could sit in the priority seats without hesitation.

Yesterday, at the hospital, a laboratory technician was surprised to see me walking with a cane. When I explained that I was using it as a precaution—“a cane before a fall,” so to speak—she seemed relieved.

She said,

“It’s good, isn’t it? People around you can understand.”

Only now have I realized the importance of letting others know that one has some kind of physical difficulty.

Every morning, I take a bus to the hospital where I work.

There are many people on that bus who have disabilities—or perhaps it would be more accurate to say, people who are not feeling well.

I asked myself whether I had really shown enough consideration for such people.

As a pathologist, I naturally understand that people in hospital rooms and operating rooms are patients, and that they are unwell.

But what about when I step outside that world?

What have I actually been doing?

At most, I have helped people get baby strollers on and off the bus.

The other day, before I injured my foot, I gave up my seat to someone wearing a Help Mark. But it was a priority seat, so that was only natural.

To think that I had been living day to day with only this level of awareness and action makes me feel rather ashamed as a medical professional.

Unfortunately, I do not seem to have had much of what one might call “consideration for the vulnerable.”

To care for such people means, first of all, to be aware that they are there.

And then, it means trying to imagine how they feel.

Sooner or later, I myself will become truly “vulnerable.”

Until then, how I choose to act may determine the state of mind I will have when that time comes.

In that sense, this injury has made me think about something important.

Perhaps it has not been entirely bad after all.

A cane may be inconvenient, but it has shown me a part of the world I had not properly seen.

・・・

Vocabulary for Learners

cane
A stick used to support someone while walking.
杖。

nuisance
Something annoying, troublesome, or inconvenient.
邪魔なもの、厄介なもの。

inconvenience
A situation or object that causes trouble or difficulty.
不便、不都合。

Take care of yourself
A common phrase used to tell someone to look after their health.
お大事に。

priority seat
A seat reserved for elderly people, pregnant women, people with disabilities, or others who need it.
優先席。

without hesitation
Without feeling unsure or embarrassed.
ためらわずに。

as a precaution
Done in advance to prevent something bad from happening.
念のため、予防的に。

physical difficulty
A condition that makes moving or walking difficult.
身体的な不自由。

show consideration for
To think about another person’s needs or feelings and act accordingly.
〜に配慮する。

Help Mark
A Japanese sign showing that a person may need assistance or consideration, even if their difficulty is not visible.
ヘルプマーク。

the vulnerable
People who are in a weaker or more difficult position and may need support.
弱い立場にある人、支援を必要とする人。

be aware that they are there
To notice the existence of people one had not really seen before.
その人たちの存在に気づく。

state of mind
One’s mental or emotional condition.
心持ち、心の状態。

#Cane #Empathy #DisabilityAwareness #Aging #DailyEssay #JapaneseEssay #ColoKen

Four Legs at Birth...

An injured ankle, an old walking stick that once belonged to my father, and a small joke from my mother made me think about aging, dependence, and the strange way we notice other people’s pain only after experiencing our own.

The rainy season front, now pushed northward and stimulated by the typhoon, has brought heavy rain to the Tohoku region.

I am worried about my relatives who live there.

It seems that we, too, will have rain toward the weekend, so the situation still requires caution.

The pain in my injured right ankle is gradually subsiding, thankfully, but the swelling has not yet gone down.

Yesterday, my wife, worried about the way I was limping, went all the way to my family home in Tokyo to pick up one of my late father’s walking sticks.

Apparently, my mother was worried about me, too, but she also joked:

“Imagine Koroken needing a cane before I do. That makes me feel happy—as if I am still young.”

Well, in this case, it is only because of an injury. Sooner or later, I will probably be able to walk without a cane again.

But someday, even without any injury, a cane will become something I can no longer do without.

Today, if I had forced myself, I probably could have walked while dragging my foot.

But, as the Japanese saying goes, “A cane before a fall.”

Since my wife had gone to the trouble of bringing several canes back for me, I chose one.

It looked familiar.

Then I realized that it was probably the cane I had once given to my father, either for Father’s Day or for his birthday.

A quiet little act of SDGs, I muttered to myself.

The last time I used any kind of cane was when I sprained my ankle playing basketball as a student.

That was about forty years ago.

Back then, it was crutches.

The day before yesterday and yesterday, I happened to see people on crutches in several different places.

A man who looked like an office worker on the train home.

A student on a school trip who was standing in front of me in the station restroom.

And on the bus, someone who appeared to be a hospital staff member was also using crutches.

I realized that there are more people like this than I had imagined.

But perhaps I noticed them only because I myself was experiencing the inconvenience of foot pain.

Only after feeling pain ourselves do we notice the pain of others.

Human beings are, in that sense, thoroughly self-interested creatures.

Still, using a cane makes walking remarkably easier.

I am not exactly limping anymore.

At least, I feel as though I am walking normally.

Of course, I cannot run. And in the first place, I am walking with a cane.

For the time being, I may eventually return to life without one.

But just as in the riddle of the Sphinx, the day will come when I, too, can no longer walk without a cane.

I will think of this episode as a kind of rehearsal for that day.

A cane in my hand today may be only temporary, but someday it will become part of the answer to the Sphinx’s old riddle.

 

・・・

Vocabulary for Learners

rainy season front
A weather front associated with the rainy season, especially in East Asia.
秋雨前線。

be stimulated by
To become more active because of another force or influence.
〜に刺激される。

subside
To become weaker, smaller, or less severe.
痛み・腫れなどが収まる。

swelling
A part of the body becoming larger because of injury or inflammation.
腫れ。

limp
To walk with difficulty because one leg or foot hurts.
足を引きずって歩く。

late father
A polite way to refer to one’s father who has passed away.
亡父。

walking stick / cane
A stick used to support someone while walking.
杖。

A cane before a fall
A translated version of the Japanese proverb “korobanu-saki-no-tsue” meaning it is wise to prepare before trouble happens.
転ばぬ先の杖。

crutches
Two supports used under the arms or at the forearms when someone cannot walk normally.
松葉杖。

self-interested
Thinking first about oneself or noticing things mainly when they affect oneself.
現金な、自己中心的な。

the riddle of the Sphinx
The ancient riddle in which a human being walks on four legs as a baby, two legs as an adult, and three legs in old age with a cane.
スフィンクスの謎かけ。

rehearsal
Practice before the real event happens.
予行演習。

#Aging #WalkingStick #Sphinx #JapaneseEssay #DailyLife #ColoKen

Achilles Tendon and Haruki Murakami: My Reading Record for August 2026

On the second day of every month, I look back on my reading from the previous month. In August 2026, I read only one book: Haruki Murakami’s long-awaited The Tale of KAHO. But the month also made me think about aging, physical decline, and the way even great writers may lose some of their former momentum.

There are still humid days, but the sky is becoming more and more autumnal. As the old Japanese saying goes, autumn evenings fall as quickly as a bucket dropping into a well. By the time I leave the hospital, it is already dark.

When autumn arrives, I gradually begin to feel a little lonely. Yesterday, something happened that only deepened that feeling.

I ran so as not to miss my train, and ended up injuring my right Achilles tendon. As a result, I spent the entire day limping on my right leg.

It still hurts this morning, but it does not seem to have ruptured. For the moment, I am managing with a compress and a supporter.

Just because I work at a hospital does not mean I can easily see a doctor. Work is packed tightly, and I cannot simply step away.

A troublesome situation.

Recently, Shohei Ohtani of the Los Angeles Dodgers has not been in good form.

Apparently, various parts of his body are hurting. Perhaps this, too, is a matter of aging. The body is no longer the same as it was when one was young.

Last month, I read only one book. It was the long-awaited new book by Haruki Murakami. But to me, it felt abruptly unfinished.

Murakami is now seventy-seven years old. Perhaps it is his age, but it seemed to me that he had lost quite a bit of his former drive.

These days, I hear more and more news of famous people passing away. Each time I hear such news, I feel regret, but at the same time I find myself thinking deeply that every human being, without exception, eventually declines.

In the end, I read only one book last month. Please note that the following review contains possible spoilers.

Reading Meter: August 2026

My August Reading Meter Summary
Books read: 1
Pages read: 352
Likes: 34

夏帆　The Tale of KAHO

My review of 夏帆　The Tale of KAHO

Is this really the end? No, surely not.

For the first time, I felt let down by Haruki Murakami.

When fewer than twenty pages remained, I began to worry about how he was going to bring this enormous story to a close. But then the Sahara Desert, the former playboy uncle, the married couple, and even the queen were all wrapped up together.

What on earth was that?

Given Murakami’s usual scale, this story could easily have been long enough for two volumes.

Did he simply become tired of dealing with it?

I had taken my time reading it, so the ending felt all the more disappointing.

I wish he would write spin-offs for each of the characters. Or perhaps I, as a reader, am supposed to imagine each of their endings for myself.

Date finished: August 8
Author: Haruki Murakami

Source: Bookmeter

A strained Achilles tendon and an unfinished Murakami novel both reminded me that decline comes for everyone.

・・・

Vocabulary for Learners

Achilles tendon
The strong tendon at the back of the ankle that connects the calf muscle to the heel.
アキレス腱。

limp
To walk with difficulty because one leg or foot hurts.
足を引きずって歩く。

rupture
To tear or break suddenly, especially inside the body.
断裂する。

compress
A cloth or pad used on an injured part of the body, often with medicine or cooling material.
湿布、冷湿布。

not be in good form
To be performing worse than usual, especially in sports or work.
調子がよくない。

former momentum
The energy, force, or drive that someone used to have.
かつての勢い。

abruptly unfinished
Ending too suddenly, without enough resolution.
尻切れ蜻蛉の、急に終わってしまった。

feel let down
To feel disappointed because something did not meet one’s expectations.
拍子抜けする、がっかりする。

wrap up
To bring a story or situation to an end.
話をまとめる、終わらせる。

without exception
For everyone or everything, with no one left out.
例外なく。

#ReadingRecord #HarukiMurakami #TheTaleOfKAHO #Bookmeter #JapaneseEssay #ColoKen

People I Want to Apologize to Before I Die

After more than sixty years of life, there are people I still wish I could apologize to. But some mistakes cannot be undone, some people cannot be found again, and even an apology may not make things right.

I have lived a fairly long life—though sixty-odd years is not really that long—and over those years, I have caused trouble for quite a few people.

Whenever we deal with someone other than ourselves—in other words, with other people—some degree of friction is almost inevitable.

That friction comes in many forms. There are people I troubled in my private life, people I troubled through work, and people for whom the personal and professional somehow overlapped.

Even within my own family, there are things I look back on and think, I should apologize for what I did back then.

When I think about it that way, the number of such things is probably beyond counting.

At the very least, I would like to settle some of those particularly unpleasant memories that have stayed with me. But once I dealt with one, I am sure another would immediately come to mind, and then another after that.

I wish I could go back to that moment and undo what I did.

But I cannot.

So sometimes I think that perhaps I could find the person now and at least apologize.

In most cases, though, even that would probably be impossible.

And even if I somehow managed to meet that person again, talk about what happened, and apologize, there is no guarantee that anything would actually be resolved.

It might even make things worse.

Perhaps this is why so many novels have been written about regret, guilt, and reconciliation.

And perhaps it is also why I am able to sit here now and keep writing down these thoughts.

Maybe this is what confession really is.

Some people believe they can confess their sins to God and ask for forgiveness. I do not have such a presence in my own life, so perhaps these feelings are simply things I will have to carry with me for the rest of it.

I sometimes wonder how overwhelming such feelings must be for someone who has committed a serious crime.

Even then, does paying one’s debt to society ever bring any relief from the suffering of guilt?

Every day, the news reports on people who have caused harm to others—from theft, workplace bullying, and fraud all the way to war.

I sometimes wonder how those people manage to bear it psychologically.

But then again, their lives are theirs.

The sense of guilt each person carries—or does not carry—is ultimately an individual matter.

If I was going to end up needing to apologize to someone, perhaps I should have lived in such a way that there would never have been anything to apologize for in the first place.

But even in small ways that I never noticed at the time, I may have made someone uncomfortable or hurt someone’s feelings.

Living among other people is difficult.

And there is no system that warns us in advance about the things we will one day regret.

It is too late now to simply go back and apologize.

There is no system that warns us in advance about the things we will one day regret.

・・・

Vocabulary for Learners

friction
Conflict or tension that happens between people because of different feelings, ideas, or interests.
人間関係の摩擦、軋轢

settle something
To deal with a problem or unfinished matter so that it no longer remains unresolved.
問題や未解決のことに決着をつける

undo
To make something return to the way it was before, as if an action had never happened.
元に戻す、取り消す

reconciliation
The process of restoring a peaceful or friendly relationship after conflict.
和解、仲直り

confession
The act of admitting something wrong that you have done, especially something that causes guilt.
告白、懺悔

ask for forgiveness
To ask someone to pardon you for something wrong you have done.
許しを請う

pay one’s debt to society
To accept punishment for a crime and complete what society requires as punishment.
罪を償う、社会に対する責任を果たす

bear it psychologically
To endure something emotionally or mentally difficult.
精神的に耐える

sense of guilt
The feeling that you have done something wrong and are responsible for it.
罪悪感

in the first place
From the beginning; before the problem happened.
そもそも、最初から

#Regret #Apology #Guilt #Forgiveness #HumanRelationships #LifeReflections #LivingWithRegret

How Can We Stop Japan from Becoming More Fragile?

As climate disasters become more frequent and aging infrastructure becomes harder to maintain, Japan seems increasingly vulnerable. But perhaps this is not only Japan’s problem. Many developed countries may be facing the same question: how do we rebuild societies that are slowly becoming more fragile?

This summer is finally nearing its end.

I worked reasonably hard and became quite exhausted, but I was able to relax a little last weekend, and I feel considerably refreshed.

The temperature is not particularly high today either, making the day relatively comfortable.

And yet, perhaps because of climate change, floods and other water-related disasters are occurring repeatedly across the country. They are beginning to feel almost routine.

Whenever I watch footage of these disasters on the news, I find myself wondering what will happen to Japan if things continue this way.

Recovery from the latest disasters will probably take a long time. Even then, I suspect it may be impossible for the affected communities to return completely to what they once were.

People often say that they will “start again from scratch,” but things that have been built up over many years cannot simply be restored overnight.

It is painful to think that people may have known what was coming and yet had little choice but to stand by and watch because there was no realistic way to prevent the disaster.

Japan’s budget for the next fiscal year is reportedly expected to reach a record 140 trillion yen.

But what exactly will all that money be used for?

There was once a Japanese politician who advocated making the Japanese archipelago more resilient.

And yet, rather than becoming more resilient, the country sometimes seems to be growing increasingly fragile, especially as infrastructure continues to age.

There are probably countless reasons why Japan has reached this point.

Even if we identify one particular cause, there will always be others. And perhaps, in some cases, we should even be grateful that things did not deteriorate further.

Still, I doubt that human beings alone can restore Japan to what it once was.

If we truly reach the point where rebuilding the country by ourselves is no longer possible, perhaps I would like to see something like “Plan A” become reality: a future in which humans and AI coexist, and society is managed more rationally with the help of AI.

And perhaps Japan is not unique in this respect.

Many countries are facing aging infrastructure, climate-related disasters, demographic pressures, rising public spending, and political systems that struggle to make long-term decisions.

Japan may simply be one of the places where these problems have become easier to see.

If, by the time my life comes to an end, AI has begun helping human societies overcome some of these problems, I think I could leave this world with considerably fewer worries about what comes next.

Perhaps the real challenge is not how to restore the world we once had, but how to build a society strong enough for the world that is coming.

・・・ 

Vocabulary for Learners

fragile
Easily damaged, weakened, or broken.
壊れやすい、脆弱な

resilient
Able to recover from difficulties, disasters, or major changes.
困難や災害から立ち直る力のある、強靭な

infrastructure
The basic systems a society needs, such as roads, bridges, water supplies, and electricity.
道路、橋、水道、電力などの社会基盤、インフラ

restore
To return something to its previous condition.
元の状態に戻す、復旧する

from scratch
From the very beginning, without relying on what existed before.
ゼロから、一から

deteriorate
To become gradually worse.
徐々に悪化する

demographic pressures
Social or economic problems caused by changes in population, such as aging or population decline.
高齢化や人口減少など人口構造の変化による社会的・経済的圧力

long-term decisions
Decisions made with future consequences in mind rather than only immediate benefits.
目先だけでなく将来を考えた長期的な意思決定

#Japan #ClimateChange #NaturalDisasters #Infrastructure #AgingSociety #ArtificialIntelligence #AI #SocialResilience #FutureOfSociety #Sustainability

In the End, Another Day of Dense Fog

 Our short trip to the Yatsugatake area ended much as it had continued—in dense fog and rain. Yet on the other side of the same weather front, people were facing something far more serious.

 

We left the hotel before noon because I had a haircut appointment later in the afternoon.

From early morning, the television was filled with reports of heavy rain warnings.

Today, it was Fukui.

With this, all three prefectures of Japan’s Hokuriku region had been hit by severe torrential rain.

The highland pastures were still buried in thick fog.

It looked as though sightseeing would be impossible again today.

There was little point even trying to enjoy a scenic drive, so we headed for the Chuo Expressway.

Without ever getting a proper view of the Yatsugatake mountains, we returned to Kamakura.

Apparently, it had been relatively cool in Kamakura today. That made me feel slightly disappointed, wondering whether we might actually have been better off staying home than spending our time in the foggy mountains.

On the news, scenes of flood damage in Fukui were being shown.

On our side of the weather front, we had experienced little more than fog and rain. But farther along that same front, people were going through something like this.

The thought filled me with sadness.

And apparently, the heat will return again tomorrow.

Sometimes the same stretch of weather brings nothing more than an inconvenient fog to one place—and disaster to another. 

 ・・・

Vocabulary for Learners

dense fog
Very thick fog that makes it difficult to see far ahead.
濃霧

torrential rain
Extremely heavy rain that falls in large amounts.
豪雨、猛烈な雨

highland pasture
Grassland in a high, mountainous area where animals may graze.
高原の牧草地、牧場

scenic drive
A drive taken mainly to enjoy beautiful views and landscapes.
景色を楽しむためのドライブ

weather front
A boundary between two different masses of air, often bringing changes in weather.
前線

flood damage
Damage to homes, roads, land, or other property caused by flooding.
水害、洪水による被害

be better off
To be in a better or more favorable situation.
〜した方がよい、〜の方がましである

#Japan #Yatsugatake #Kamakura #Hokuriku #Fukui #HeavyRain #Flooding #DenseFog #Weather #Climate