A brief moment in an online study session reminded me how easily we can mistake “I don’t understand” for “I haven’t learned enough yet.” What followed was a lesson in humility—and a reminder of what it means to remain a practicing physician.
We had an online study session, and I gave a short presentation.
During the discussion, I mentioned a result that had puzzled me. An expert who was attending immediately offered an explanation.
His explanation lasted barely ten seconds and contained five technical terms.
Yet understanding each term and combining them to reach a conclusion requires substantial knowledge.
Only after hearing him did I realize that, had I understood the subject more deeply, I could have solved it myself.
It was embarrassing.
I wanted to label the issue as “beyond my understanding,” but in truth it had been well within reach—if only I had learned enough.
When I told a colleague about this, he reminded me of the Red Queen hypothesis.
In Through the Looking-Glass, the Red Queen says:
“It takes all the running you can do, to keep in the same place.”
For me, that line becomes:
“As long as I call myself a pathologist, I must keep updating my medical knowledge.”
At a recent class reunion, I found myself grumbling that studying is exhausting.
But complaints without effort are nothing more than a pose.
For physicians, knowledge directly translates into patient benefit.
To remain a doctor, one must keep running—continuously, relentlessly.
In that sense, if I can no longer run, perhaps I should step away from the front line.
For now, I choose to take the embarrassment as progress.
And I will keep running a little longer, without hesitation.
